I Would Like My Pizza With That Delivery

The week leading up to my move to Gaborone and home leave was a stressful one. There was a high level of emotions and internal conflict. Add to that the physical drain of having to pack up my house and move everything to my boyfriend's place (for safe-keeping while I was away for five weeks) and I am sure you can imagine what I was going through. I was a bit of a mess.

But that's not to say there wasn't moments of humor in the mix. This is a short tale of one such instance...

After a particularly exhausting packing and moving day, my boyfriend and I plopped down on the couch in his living room and half passed out. And then the rumbling of our tummies startled us awake, as we realized we had neglected them most of the day. Man, were we hungry! But we were also far too tired to be bothered with going to the grocery store and the remnants in the kitchen cupboards just weren't going to suffice this time. So we made a snap decision to order pizza. Pizza is, after all, the only thing that has delivery in our part of Gaborone.

I called the pizza place to make the order. One large pizza would cost us about P88 (roughly $11). We only had a P200 note so I let them know to bring change for that. (It is important to note that you can almost never get change in Botswana. Even if you can see change in the drawer. And, if someone doesn't have exact change for you, down to the thebe, they just won't sell you the product. So alerting the pizza delivery guy to needing change is an absolute must here.)

About forty minutes later, there's a knock on the door. We were SO EXCITED about the pizza getting here that we quite literally leapt of the couch and went running for the door. We handed the delivery guy the P200 note and he gave us exact change (phew!). And then he looked at us blankly. "I forgot your pizza." "What do you mean you forgot the pizza?" "I brought you the change but forgot the pizza." The PIZZA DELIVERY GUY, the guy whose job title tells perfectly what his sole responsibility is, forgot the pizza. Only here could that happen. So off he went, back to the pizza place to pick up the pizza...

Twenty minutes later, our pizza arrived.

All you can do is laugh.

TIA.

"Goodbye, My Friend"

As I approach my last week working at my NGO, I am filled with mixed emotions and inner turmoil that could only be articulated through this clip from the 1987 movie Harry and the Hendersons:

Contrary to what you may think, I am both George and Harry in this scene. I am trying to say goodbye, I am fighting to hold on, I am trying to make sense of everything, and I am forcing myself to go.

How this is playing out in reality is that I am actively trying not to go into my center so the staff get used to not seeing me every day (and likewise for me not seeing them), while remaining at my house only a five minute walk away so they know that I am here in the village still if they need me. I am hoping this acts as a buffer or an intermediary situation before the pending departure. I am trying to do what is best but it's hard to know in times like this. I find myself having an internal monologue that sounds like screaming to go into the center then yelling to stay away followed by moans of agony as I fight back the tears.

Slowly pulling back and now, finally, withdrawing has been incredibly difficult because I want to spend every second of my last days here with the ladies. Removing myself from the center forces the staff to try things that they so often use me as a crutch for. There is no ceremonious way to impart all the knowledge so it must just be employed. I know they have learned it all and they need only to stop holding on to me. They will be okay on their own and they need the opportunity to do just that.

All that being said, I have to wonder if my withdrawing now instead of in a week is more for me or for them? Could it be my way of easing the pain on myself and to be able to witness their success first-hand before I go? It does feel better knowing that I could be there in a minute if they need me. In going back to the moment with George and Harry from the clip, it certainly does feel like bringing them to the beautiful place in the forest where they can stretch and go at it all on their own but yet being able to follow their footsteps for a while to see they made it safely out on their own...

And, In The End, There Were Emotions

I have exactly twenty-two days left in my comfortable little village and only thirteen days left working at my NGO and with the ladies that have become my family in Gabane.

This is an emotional time. 

It just doesn't seem possible that my two years here are up and I am having a hard time wrapping my brain around leaving here. Even though my ticket to America is booked for my home leave and I can see the upcoming date on a calendar, it still doesn't feel real. It is as if my brain has employed a defense mechanism to keep me from feeling the anxiety and heartache of leaving something I love so much. Even if it is just to start something new nearby. I have to consciously remind myself to cherish each moment with the ladies of my NGO, to take the time to do the "secret handshake" with each kid in the pre-school, and to greet each person I meet on the dusty paths around Gabane. In a matter of days it will all be a memory. When I think about how fast two years went, it is overwhelming (even heartbreaking) to think how fast these last few days will likely go.

This is also a time when I am pushing to get projects and things finished but also trying to disconnect from the work in a more meaningful way. This is something I have blogged about a lot - the idea of true sustainable development. Of course, I have things I want to get done and see through here before I go. For example, the house building project is complete but the sanitation component - the pit latrine - is not quite finished yet. Same goes for some aspects of my organizational development project at the NGO. But, at the same time, I need to back away and make sure the ladies can do everything on their own. I need to observe them and support them in their own personal development if the things we have worked so hard on are to be sustainable. And, so far, they are.

I have watched the ladies take ownership of projects and work diligently to get the financial systems in place or to improve the teaching curriculum and our reports. The Board of Governors has finally been elected and they are taking an active role in helping scale up our operation. The members are coming to the office and conducting their own mini trainings and helping the ladies network with local people who can assist them. Local people helping local people to help the local community. This is a huge accomplishment. I have always said that, as a capacity builder and development worker, if I am able to make my job obsolete and unnecessary because the staff and community are able to do it on their own, then I have done my job well. Being able to witness this happening first-hand is bringing me peace and soothing some of the sorrow of leaving as I hesitantly look forward to the end of this chapter.

Saying goodbye is probably one of the hardest things anyone can do. This is a time filled with that - goodbyes to my fellow Bots 10s as they embark on their next adventures (on their own), goodbyes to my village and my work, and goodbyes to a life where I could be anything I wanted on any given day of the week (a farmer, a social worker, a teacher, a consultant, an accountant, a youth leader, an artist, and so on). Goodbyes are made harder when you deeply love all the things you are bidding adieu. And that is where we stand now.

For me, this goodbye is also met with some exciting hellos - to a new life, to a new job, to new challenges, to new faces. There is glory and elation and vitality in moving forward from something achieved and towards the great unknown. It is, after all, how I got to this place in my life that has become so special to me.

I am going to try and take the next twenty-two days to "hug" this world I am in now and shower it with all my love. I want to feel the emotions of it all and embrace them. I want to leave all of who I am right now in the sand of my village and with the people who have helped me grow here so that I can start this next chapter in Botswana anew.

Getting a Head Start: Third Year Assignments

Third year assignments typically start after a PCV finishes their work at site and reaches their original COS date. For many extendees (myself included), this also means they usually take their month-long "special home leave" before starting their new assignment. This allows for significant closure to be reached in their projects before beginning something new (and sometimes wholly different).

As I have mentioned before, I will have two assignments when I start my third year: one with Project Concern International (PCI) as a Technical Advisor for their Tsela Kgopo OVC and Gender Project and the other with Peace Corps as a Volunteer Leader. I will officially begin my new assignments on July 1st. But, as you likely could infer from my ramblings over the past two years, I have never been one for "going with the grain", so to speak. My natural instinct is to gather all the information available and dive head-first into whatever lies before me. This has served me well in the past so it is no surprise that I would do the same again here in Botswana with my third year assignments.

PCVL Head Start

Two weeks ago, my Country Director called and asked me if I would be willing to help plan and host a "Take Your Kid To Work Day" at the Peace Corps office. My role would be to come up with the agenda and activities, coordinate volunteers, and facilitate the day. A chance to play with adorable little kids all day and call it "work"?! Of course I agreed!

In collaboration with the office's Executive Assistant, I planned the agenda for the day. We decided to make it like a real work day for the kids (aged 3- to 10-years-old). They would get "official" nametags with the Peace Corps insignia and the title "Junior Staff" presented at a mock staff meeting in the morning, where they would also take their Oath of Service alongside their parents and other staff. They would go on to receive "medical clearance", complete with watching their heartbeat on a monitor, then go through "security check", which meant learning about basic safety then learning how to use an air horn and put out a real fire with a fire extinguisher! The rest of the day required them to be "Program Support" for the different sectors their parents worked in. Activities included shredding paper (big fun for a little kid!), stamping envelopes, and making friendship bracelets and doing crafts (to help come up with fun activities for PCVs to do with kids in their villages, of course!).

Besides being such a fun day playing with all the kids, it allowed me to see the staff from a more humanist perspective. Yes, we are all a family here - staff and PCVs - but it becomes a more powerful connection when you open up and see these more intimate moments. Knowing that I'm going to be working so closely with them in the upcoming year, I feel this was the perfect opportunity to share something deeper and I feel fortunate to have had the opportunity. Also, have I mentioned that I like playing with adorable kids? Because their energy and excitement over it all really makes it worthwhile. Totally.

PCI Head Start

Last week, after submitting my updated resume, one of the staff from PCI called and asked if I would be willing to attend a meeting put on by UNESCO (United Nations Educational, Scientific, and Cultural Organization) and UNDP (United Nations Development Programme). The meeting was being called to review and revise a toolkit for HIV prevention and treatment for adolescents - a facilitator's guide for trainers, a manual for teachers, and three separate workbook for adolescents (ages ranging between 10-years-old and 19-years-old). Essentially, there is a pre-existing toolkit that has been being used in South Africa, Zimbabwe, Zambia, and other Southern African nations, and they are hoping to implement something similar in Botswana. To do this, they asked a group of experts to assemble and adapt the current documents to something usable here.

The room was literally full of the best minds Botswana has to offer and some of the highest government officials. They ranged from the heads of NACA (Botswana's National AIDS Coordinating Agency), the Ministries of Education and Health, and Baylor Children's Clinic to directors of some of the key national and international NGOs dealing with adolescent health issues in the country. I felt like a very small face in this specialized crowd and wondered why I had been invited to join this meeting. I resolved to try my best to contribute and to learn as much as I could during the meeting, in the hopes of being a valuable resource in the future.

By the end of our first reading of the documents, the representatives in my group were providing me with accolades for my insights and all that I had to offer in terms of contextualizing the document for Batswana youth and for organizational structure and ease of use. It seems that my work on the ground and in the villages has provided me with keen insights often overlooked at this higher level that were extremely useful in revising the toolkit. To the point that the project head from UNESCO asked me if I would be willing to continue my revisions after the meeting because they wanted to get it finalized and begin implementation by June of this year.

All of this gave me confidence in myself and in the skills and knowledge I have developed during my time here. I was overjoyed to be in this company and to be able to contribute meaningfully to the project. I was proud of myself and grateful that PCI felt I was a worthy representative for their organization.

So here I am, with less than a month left in my two year contract, preparing and actually starting some activities for my future extension assignments. I am so content with where things are going and full of excitement about the work ahead of me. I think this is really going to be something great!

The House is BUILT!

Today marks a collosal achievement in this Peace Corps Volunteer's service! Why? Because the project I have been working on to build a house for a destitute family of ten is finally complete! Yes, that's right folks, THE HOUSE IS BUILT!!! It is a little later than we expected but it is finally finished. Getting this family into a home has been such a huge project and required a collaborative effort within my village as well as local and international support. I can tell you that it has all been worth it!

The house has five rooms (which is a mansion compared to the previous one-room structure they were all living in before) and a covered outdoor cooking area. Plus, the mattresses I got donated are all inside the house now so the kids have a cozy place to sleep at night. This family now has a place to call "home" (just in time for winter). What's more, the family is so grateful for and amazed by their new home that they have actually opened their doors and invited other children who didn't have a place to live to stay with them. Generosity certainly does seem to breed generosity.

I am so happy that I could literally cry. This is a tangible achievement and something that I will be forever proud of.

Last Site Visit in Gabane

On Monday I had my last official site visit with Peace Corps staff at my NGO in Gabane. My Program Manager and Training Assistant came out to the village to meet with me and the staff to discuss my work and my contributions to the NGO. Traditionally, this meeting is conducted in three parts: one where I meet with PC staff by myself to discuss issues I have had, another where the NGO staff meet with PC staff alone, and finally all of us as one. We opted, however, to do the entire meeting together because we feel that our relationship allows for openness, honesty, and transparency and didn't need the "secret meetings". I am grateful that we decided this way because it allowed me to hear the sentiments of the women I have been working with for so long.

Although the ladies and I are not shy about sharing our feelings and often compliment each other on jobs well done, they said some of the nicest things to the Peace Corps staff about me - things that I hadn't even realized I had helped them with. For example, our Center Coordinator told Peace Corps that, before I came, they had never worked off of a plan and just did things day-to-day. She said that, when discussing the work that we have to do, I am always saying "lets make a plan" so now they know how important it is to do that and they feel they are able to accomplish more because of it. (I didn't even realize I say "lets make a plan" so much, let alone that it had a positive impact on them!) She also said that I am the best teacher they have ever had. This is a huge compliment as she's a teacher herself with over thirty years experience in the field! She went on to justify this statement by saying that I explain things in a way that highlights their strengths so they feel confident and like they can succeed, that they can always feel my love for them, and that they feel encouraged to try harder and accomplish more on their own than they ever thought possible before because of this.

Hearing their kind words made me feel so great about my service in a way that I cannot yet articulate clearly. All I can say is this: when asked by Peace Corps staff at the onset of the meeting, before the ladies were even asked anything yet, what I felt has been my greatest accomplishment of my service, I told them that "...There are many tangible projects and things I can point to that define my service but what I feel most proud of is the confidence and skills developed by the ladies I work with. Their passion and dedication to the organization was always evident but they are also strong and capable and are finally seeing it for themselves and putting their knowledge to use to help so many people. If I helped them get to this point in some way then I feel that is my biggest accomplishment. They are more than colleagues - they are my family and friends here - and watching them succeed has been more meaningful than I could have ever hoped for."

The things they said that followed my statement bring more profundity, depth, and value to my service. For the first time in my professional career, I genuinely feel like I have made a difference. And that difference goes deeper than in the workplace because it is about the people. It is a change that is profound in me, in the lives of those I have worked with, and in this whole experience. I will carry this with me forever.

My Left Eye: Insights And Analysis

A friend of mine emailed me in regard to my post about my close of service medical, specifically about the part where I congratulated my left eye for getting stronger. This is what he said:

So, Tija, I was reading your blog and I wanted to not only congratulate your left eye, but suggest that its resilience may actually be indicative of something much more insightful. :)

In high school, my English teacher taught me about a Sufi tradition: that you can see ones soul through their left eye. This really stuck with me. In fact, I find that even today, when I look at people in the eyes, I tend to focus in on their left eye.

What this has to do with you, I believe, is that your refurbished retina may be the result of a much greater transformation you've undergone since being in Botswana. If anything in your writing has pointed out in the last two years is that your service has lifted you to higher and happier heights than where you have ever been! You have been enriched by your life and your work. Your soul has been filled with so much life and love that it has, too, transformed and been uplifted.

Now literally, metaphorically, pragmatically, spiritually even perhaps, you can see the world more clearly. See the problems that need to be fixed, how to help solve them, and the path on which you should walk, skip, and dance on through life!

Wow.  Could this be true? His words certainly make me smile and I am honored by them. I definitely feel the transformation that has gone on inside of me and in the way I view the world and my place in it. I feel grateful with my entire being, my entire soul. I humbly thank my friend for believing in me like this and for sharing this tradition with me.

Two Years "In The Field"

Today I went through the 3,031 pictures from my family's visit to Botswana. It was such a remarkable trip - my heart will always smile when I think about it. Besides being one of the best memories of my time here, though, looking back through their pictures allows me to see Botswana through their eyes and reminds me of how unique and wonderful this whole experience is. It's easy to forget how special it is when it becomes your daily life. I have been incredibly blessed to be here.

Two years ago today I set foot in Botswana... And what an incredibly eye-opening, earth-shattering, crazy, beautiful two years it has been.

Pelegano Village Industries

I love Gabane. I believe it is a very special village and I feel privileged to call it "home". I actually take pride in it. People hear me clamor on and on about all the great things in Gabane and I am constantly inviting people to come and see and experience it all for themselves. Peace Corps Volunteers in Botswana know there is an open invitation to visit me. Among the things I share with all visitors are our community hangout, where people come to braai and relax together, and our artist colony, Pelegano Village Industries.

Pelegano Village Industries (PVI) is a community-based artist colony that houses artists and artisans and showcases their work. Included in the compound is work related to: arts and crafts (pottery, glass art, and fine arts), textiles and embroidery, manufacturing, welding fabrication, and the like. All of the products made are created locally and made by Batswana in the village. Places like this are unique in Botswana, as many of the crafts sold here are brought in from other countries (namely Zimbabwe and Kenya). At PVI, however, you can meet the craftsmen and, if you befriend the right people, try your hand at some pottery or learn a thing or two about textile paints. Watching beautiful creations come to life and chatting freely with those making them is a perfect way to spend an afternoon in Gabane. And, what's more, the proceeds from sales at PVI goes back into local projects like the one at my NGO.

I recently got the opportunity to share this unique experience with a group of fellow Peace Corps Volunteers who came to visit. Some of them were buying souvenirs as they prepare to go home to America after so long living abroad. Others tagged along to see what I had been bragging all about for so long. Regardless of their reason, no one was disappointed in coming.

The PCVs were overwhelmed by the beauty of the crafts and excited to meet the artists. The energy was palpable, both in the PVI compound and among my peers. Getting to come and see all the different crafts and the kind people that make them was exciting for them and seeing their faces light up as they frantically chose items to take home with them was rejuvenating for me.

This is why I rave about Gabane - it is a special place. Now these PCVs get one of the many reasons why I love my village. Those staying in Botswana will be back... with friends (and more pula)!

A Message From My Extension Organization

i've met my match

Medical Clearance #2

At the end of service, Peace Corps Volunteers undergo a rigorous medical examination. This includes routine physical and dental exams but also includes a review of your medical history (especially of changes occurring during service), a complete blood work up, TB test, gynecological exam (for the ladies), and stool samples to check for parasites etc. The whole lot is completed over a series of three days. Peace Corps wants to make sure that volunteers return from their service healthy and that there is a detailed record of anything and everything that came up during the two years abroad.

For those of us with intentions of extending our service, the close of service medical examination also serves as our second workup for medical clearance with the government. Much like the medical portion of our application process, there is some anxiety in the waiting.

Last week I underwent my medical review. I was poked, prodded, and probed. Before coming here, the idea of so many needles and doctor's appointments was terrifying but now I feel stronger and like seasoned veteran. These things no longer worry me. Needles were the least of my fears. More so, I was concerned that my weight gain during service might be a problem or the fact that I have had some sleep issues or occasional diarrhea - I didn't want anything to hold me back from staying in Botswana for another year. And, although my problems are common and therefore shouldn't be of concern, these things are all in my record and I had no way of knowing what would be a red flag.

It turns out there was no need to worry. Today I received word from our Medical Officer (PCMO) that my tests came back and everything is clear! I am happy to say that I have, one again, received medical clearance for service in the US Peace Corps! Three cheers for being healthy!

At this time, I would also like to give a very big round of applause and congratulations to my left eye! It seems that it has gotten stronger during my service. While both my eyes used to reach a perfect 20/20 when wearing my glasses, my left eye now scored a 20/13! I did a happy dance and jumped around when my PCMO told me, sending the entire office into hysterics and causing the PCMO to draw stars all around the (improved) record. Not gonna lie, I am pretty impressed that two years living in the bush has actually improved my overall health!

Another really exciting thing that happens after receiving medical clearance for extension volunteers is that you can official apply for Special Home Leave, or the period of one month when volunteers extending for an entire year can return back to their Home of Record at the Peace Corps' expense.

For volunteers like me who haven't gone home during their entire service, this is very exciting (both for the PCV and for family and friends). As you can imagine, within seconds of receiving my clearance, I sent an email to our Director of Management and Operations to request my leave dates. I heard back minutes later that my request is being sent to our travel agent for pricing and review. This means I should know the exact dates I will be in the United States very very soon! While nothing is set yet, those who like to get excited as early as possible (like me) can plan on my arrival some time in late May! Keep this in mind, folks, because I will definitely be hitting you up for welcome home parties, 30th birthday parties, and lots of hang out time! (Also important to note, you should probably start saving your pennies because I'll be surviving on $15/day - which is almost twice what I make now but I'm living in a rural village and not in America - and will need you to either take me out on dates or be keen for deck time on Mama Tina's back porch!)

A Tribute to Bots 10

This week marks another milestone for my group - the first of us to make it to our COS Conference is boarding a plane and heading back to the good ol' U-S-of-A. It is hard to believe we have come so far and are now at this point. One thing I know for sure, long after this Peace Corps experience is through, the faces of my Bots 10 family will be clear in my mind. I will recall all of the times we shared together, however long, and that will be what makes it all so special. So, in tribute to the men and women who took the Peace Corps plunge, I say thank you. Here's to always remembering the 40 members of Bots 10!

To the one that made the grand romantic gesture and never got on the plane (congratulations for marrying the woman of your dreams!)...

To those who didn't make it through PST...

To those who left us early...

To those who made it all the way to COS...

 

And to those who are sticking around for a third year...

As every person in these pictures can attest, it has been one heck of a wild ride. I can't imagine a more wacky, amazing, inspiring, diverse, or thoughtful group to have shared this experience with. While I am sure everyone says it, I really do feel like we have the best group. I am so grateful to each person in it for adding and enhancing this time in Botswana. I love you, Bots 10!

Water and Power and Smiles, Oh My!

I don't want to jinx it so I am knocking on wood as I write this but, after weeks without, my village once again has power and water! This means that schools have re-opened, clothes are being washed and hung out to dry, and people are no longer looking to the skies and praying for rain. (Of course, I am still hoarding water and urging my friends to do the same just in case the pipes dry out again. I've been tricked into a false sense of security before.) But, at least for now, I am happy to report that all of my electronics are fully charged and my water containers (and bathtub) are filled with water. This is one of those Peace Corps victories that can't be quantified on a resume but that feels like a huge triumph when you're living it...

PULA!

Almost as if the universe realized my village needed a "pick me up" yesterday, it rained. At about 8pm, I heard the thunder roaring from somewhere in the distance and by 10pm, despite not having power, the village lit up with the lightening strikes. And then, at about 1am, the most incredible thing happened. I was awaken by the sound of people laughing and talking. I reached for my glasses and scurried half asleep to the window to see what the commotion was about. It was still pouring rain so it took a minute for my eyes to adjust but, during a lightening flash, I saw it. Dozens of people were outside, singing and laughing and talking merrily, with buckets in their hands! Just as I have done before, the community allowed nature to help them fix a problem that the government could not. And they were joyous. I picked up my bucket and I joined them for a while - giggling and stomping through puddles like a child. It was one of those Peace Corps moments that you just can't beat! PULA!

Water Problems Continue

In America, having potable drinking water and a constant water supply is never a problem. Almost magically, it is there whenever you need it. If you have followed my story, however, then you know this is not the case in Botswana. I have gone months on end without water and have, on occasion, put buckets outside to catch precious rain water. Some of my peers have to walk up to 5km to fill up buckets to carry home because they don't have running water or a water pump nearby. Water is an issue.

Volunteers in Botswana are lucky, though, in that our water has been safe to drink. I have been drinking it straight from the tap for nearly two years and have had no problems at all. That was until recently, when a number of random quality tests were conducted and the water failed to meet US Embassy standards. They advised us that water in my region intended for human consumption should be boiled. Before receiving this statement, I had been having some stomach problems (eww) so I started boiling my water and they ceased. Boiling water is laborious, especially during the heat of summer when all you want is something cold to drink. As of last week, after talking with a health specialist who told me the situation had been cleared up, I have stopped boiling my water. Gratefully, my tummy has not been rattled so I believe she was right and the water is fine now. (After all, the best way to find out is to try it out and my body isn't reacting...) Happy day, right? Wrong. As annoying as it is having to boil water, it pales in comparison to the alternative... no water.

Today the Water Utilities Corporation released the following statement: "The Water Utilities Corporation (WUC) would like to inform residents of Gaborone City and surrounding areas (Mochudi, Gabane, Kumakwane, Mogoditshane, Tlokweng, Lobatse and their surrounding areas) that it is currently experiencing water supply challenges. Due to this, they will experience low pressure to no water at all indefinitely. Residents are advised to wisely use the little available water." INDEFINITELY?! We are going to be without water indefinitely?! To my great dismay (but not to my surprise), this public statement came out AFTER the water cuts arrived in my village, meaning that none of us had the time to prepare. We are already without water and now without means of stocking up. While we all live with water challenges every day, this is incredibly difficult to hear. Although Peace Corps Volunteers hoard water like it's our jobs, there is never enough for our "shorter" week-long outages. It is in these moments when I wish I had a pit latrine because at least then I could go to the bathroom in peace without worrying about using 3L of water to flush... The question then becomes: "What happens to us and to the local communities if the water really is out indefinitely?"

I beg all of you back in America, please cherish every time you turn the faucet on and water comes out and that it is clean water to drink. I will never take those things for granted again.

Extension Granted!

Despite incessant (and inconvenient) water and power outages, hairy spiders, ant hordes, insane temperatures, and thorns in my shoes, I love it here. Yes, I said it, I love Botswana. I have fallen in love with the simple life in the village and with international development work. Although I had a hunch before coming here that this might be the case, there really was no way for me to predict how deep my love would be. And, honestly, my trials at the beginning definitely pointed more towards "enmity" than "love". But this love has grown from frustration and disappointment and perseverance and is likely stronger because of it. It is like your favorite romantic comedy movie - girl wants to find love, girl sets out to find it, girl is angry with and/or hates what is set in front of her (usually a guy, in this case the work), girl fights it, girl feels like all hope is lost, girl has a realization or transformation, girl flirts with the thing she once resented, and finally girl realizes it's the only thing for her. I didn't think this sort of romance happened in real life. But, like many people before me, I have been surprised by the way things turn out. This could very well be the tale of my pursuit and my love of international development work.

But I made it! I saw the light at the end of the tunnel, my heart flickered, and I got a warm fuzzy feeling with every person who learned something from me and with every organization that ran a little smoother. And that is why, with a joyous heart and an excited mind, I announce that my application for extension was granted! I have been given the opportunity to continue pursuing this love and see where the next phase in the journey takes me!

For my extension year ("third year"), I am assuming two roles:

In my first role, I will be working with Project Concern International (PCI). PCI is an international non-governmental organization that currently operates in 16 countries to promote sustainable change and community development. I will be working directly with two projects funded by USAID - one for orphans and vulnerable children and the other for integrated childhood and youth development. In this capacity, I will get the opportunity to oversee and manage high level projects that I am passionate about, work alongside leaders in their field, and also continue doing some field work with PCI's 10 implementing partners across Botswana. 

In my second role, I will be acting as a Peace Corps Volunteer Leader (PCVL). The role of a PCVL is multifaceted and includes: working with Peace Corps staff to assess organizations and villages for successful site development; mitigating issues between staff, volunteers, and host country nationals; assisting with regional support issues; designing and conducting trainings for incoming volunteers; liaising for Peace Corps Botswana, connecting staff with volunteers; and informing current PCVs about available resources to better assist their host country agencies. I am passionate about Peace Corps' mission and believe that every volunteer deserves the best chance to make the most of their service. I am thrilled to have the chance to put my magnanimous experience to work in helping serving volunteers.

I am overwhelmed and excited about the potential for personal growth and the opportunity to continue doing good work at an even greater magnitude in these new roles. To me, it is my perfect placement. I have incredible hopes for this country, its people, and the work Peace Corps is doing. I know these hopes are achievable because, time and again, my dreams in this country have come true. I am honored to have the opportunity to stay here one more year to see that continue to happen.

Whoa! We Made It! Bots 10 COS Conference

How do you sum up two years of your life? Even in the best of circumstances, it would be extremely difficult. Throw in the confines of risk, adventure, unknowns, cultures, creepy crawlies, and a life in a far far away place that you ventured to all on your own and a person can be at a loss for words. And, if not lost for words, then definitely overwhelmed by them. Either way, the result is the same. That is where I sit now, at the conclusion of my Close of Service (COS) Conference and in my final months at site. Contemplating everything.

Our COS Conference was a time when my cohort, my Bots 10 family, was able to reconnect. This was invaluable, as I hadn't seen some members since our mid-service training a year ago. I realize it may be hard to understand how these people have remained so integral to my service and how amazing it was to reunite, but they are among the few who actually understand what Peace Corps service in Botswana is like. We can recount our own experiences and have them feel like a joint memory because we "get it" in a way that no one else could. Being afforded the time together to catch up, to share our stories, and to decompress, was probably the most cherished part of our COS Conference. This could very well be our last time in the same room together and will definitely be our last in country together. As you can likely imagine, this reality caused a few tears from more than a few people (myself included).

Tears were also met with laughter as we had dinner on the salt pans in the Nata Bird Sanctuary, recounting humorous tales showcasing each of us and paid homage to those from our group who left us early. Bots 10 has not forgotten anyone - we are all a part of this story, even the one who never made it on the plane in New York. "The Survivors" sitting around the table with the expanse of the pans and the fading sun, regaling everyone with great love and admiration, was one of my favorite moments and one that will stick with me long after this adventure.

While the emotions of our COS Conference are among the highlights, they are not the sole purpose of the week. More seriously, the conference serves as an opportunity to prepare for the goodbyes in our villages and the transition back home. It is a time to construct our "elevator speech", knowing that most people will not want the full account of our two year hiatus, and learning how to quantify our work and cope with the many changes in ourselves and in the world we left behind.

Many of us have some concerns about returning to America, whether it be about reverse culture shock, consumerism, personal growth and change, making sense of our experience and bringing it back with us, rectifying relationships with friends from home, and so on. My fears encompass many of these things. For example, I am nervous that people will expect me and expect things to continue on just as they had before I left but these things won't feel normal to me anymore. There will be a necessary adjustment in the way things once were. I have changed and I am happy with who I am. But I wonder how this will impact my relationships and my life when I return. My experiences in Botswana have been profound and have impacted me in ways that I am sure I can't even imagine yet. How will I react to all of this? Will I be compassionate and patient with those who don't see the world as I do now? Will they show me that same respect when I find things hard to deal with? And who will let me ramble on and on about my service, even after the "acceptable" statute of limitations has passed? These were some of the things we discussed at length throughout the conference. In the end, my group agreed that it will be vital to maintain our friendships with fellows Bots 10s. They will be our lifeline and our connection to this world. We are also grateful for those friends and family who have stuck by us in one way or another because we genuinely believe we will need to lean on them during this period of transition and re-entry.

And, finally, how do you say goodbye? How do you say goodbye to people who have been your main source of support and friendship in an unfamiliar land? How do you thank strangers that took you in as family? How do you leave a village whose paths welcomed you home every day? Most of us won't return to Botswana again. These goodbyes will tear at the heartstrings of even the most jaded of us. And this is our next big challenge and what we will focus on in our final months at site. Just 80 days until departure...

Students Learn About Life In The Village

A local friend of mine, who is a teacher at an international school in Gaborone, came to me a few weeks back and told me about a unit her class was doing on "children around the world". The aim of the unit was to teach her students about difference and similarities among children in the far reaches of the globe. This lesson was exceptionally pertinent to this class, as her students hail from many continents (all, however, seeming to come from some privilege). She expressed that she wanted her class to learn more about the children in Botswana, of which many had no direct knowledge, and to gain some sense of civil responsibility. We decided that the best way forward was for her class to come to the OVC Pre-School at my NGO and spend a day playing and interacting with the children.

In the weeks leading up to the event, my friend explained to her class about "orphan and vulnerable children status", what life was like in the village as compared to the capital city, the nature of giving back, and the magnitude of even small efforts for those who have so little. In this spirit, her class put on a bake sale to raise money to donate to my NGO and held a drive for clothes, games, toys, and other sundries.

When the day of the event came, the students arrived in a combi followed by a truck full of their collections. It was like Christmas morning for our center! They brought so many things that the staff and children both burst into tears. One by one, the visiting students took giant packages from the truck and laid them before us. It was unmatched by any other donation. In all the time I have been here, I haven't seen such a display of love and generosity. And, I have to state, that since the gifts were brought to our center, the children have been playing with them and learning so much (they have even learned how to do puzzles!). It's been so exciting for all of us.

After some opening remarks by our Coordinator, the children were free to interact and get to know one another.

The visiting students and our children buddied up to either play on the gym equipment outside, to color pictures, or to play soccer or other games in the yard. It was a day full of insurmountable laughter and one that I imagine will not soon be forgotten by anyone present.

Here are pictures from the day's festivities:

Ultimately, this day of fun was one that expanded the hearts and minds of everyone involved. It ended up being more than just a day within a unit for the visiting classroom but encompassed a world of giving of time, resources, things, and of love. Both sets of students learned about gratitude. And we learned that, despite circumstance, we really aren't all that different. After all, everyone likes a good time!